Author: thomas

A friend recently suggested that my “next” blog should be about friendships and what that means to me. I’ve had a few weeks to ponder that suggestion and came to the conclusion that if I wanted good friends, I had to be good friend too. That may seem simple to many, but it wasn’t a natural concept for me.

During my professional career, which lasted 3 decades, the focus was slightly different. Friends were usually colleagues or employees or neighbors. During those decades, I was extraordinarily busy and not at all focused on the premise of being a good friend too. I really had no expectations and took things as they were. Survival, apathy, or complacency? Perhaps a mix.

Fast forward to, like, a couple of years ago when I stayed with my friend Jerald in Austin. Steve came down from MI and an amazing group joined us for a weekend which has yet to be topped. All of the group were friends from my high school days. Our hugs confirmed that our genuine love for each other had not passed. Not at all. Throughout the weekend our relationships solidified even more. It was like crazy cool. Still is.

I don’t know how I managed to pull it off, but I think I was a good friend to everyone.

I have managed to make a few good friends in my forever new hometown of Asheville. I will never profess to being easy. It would be a lie for sure. So the story goes…

I’m searching for a one-liner to finish this little story;

A friend is a bond, a bond which is full of trust, compassion, tolerance, acceptance, and love between two friends. The “bond” is sticky at each end…

I supposedly retired a year and a half ago. But that sucked in many ways. Boredom and complacency were probably the biggest set backs. Along the way, Tina and I had many discussions about the idea of remodeling our home. Money, hassle, process, annoyances, etc. were the usual topics.

We said yes, yes to letting me transform this home. It sort of reminds me of the time, I convinced Tina to let me start my own business. That worked out well, btw. So I decided to hire a designer. Not a furniture store designer but a professional accredited interior designer. It was a difficult process but I found a match. Someone with talent and a particular design taste that matched this house and my vision.

The designer, was initially hired to help us with two bathrooms and a few ideas beyond that. Eventually it became “we need to keep Tom busy.” Her words.

So the project advanced into many other areas. What began to happen is cohesiveness. This house is becoming very cohesive. Every space and element leads and supports a journey and a satisfaction. The cohesiveness is because we trusted our designer. We continue to do so.

What is the Idea of Doing? Probably the reality of how much I have done. Retirement takes many forms. My expectation of a “normal” retirement, if there is such a thing, is that it’s boring. Not cool.

The idea transformed into reality. Lot’s of choices, challenges, frustrations, exuberance, crazy cool shit, you name it. But the thing is, I had to become a builder, electrician, plumber, painter, etc. I tore down ceilings and walls and completely altered the interior of this home.

The benefit of the idea and doing is the transference of the idea into reality. It was and is stressful. I had to learn quite a bit and had to make some goofy decisions. Don’t regret it. Not at all.

Probably the most important part of this story is I found a few people whom I could depend upon. I found some real talent and wonderful souls to assist and facilitate the goal of making my home, super cool.

I am immensely proud to be retired, yet not retired… Find that, be that.

I grew up in a small town in South Texas. Mexican food or Tex-Mex, as most would call the style of food was a staple in our diet. And it is good food.

There are numerous very delicious restaurants serving up excellent Mexican food in Uvalde. But there is only one Vasquez restaurant. It’s a family business which began way back. Henry Vasquez was a special kind of guy. He had a big personality. Not loud but engaging, and passionately shared his “home” with all.

You’ve probably never experienced any other place quite like Vasquez. The atmosphere was very basic and very old, and dark… I don’t think anyone cared because the food was so good. Those enchiladas and those nachos. Legendary to say the least.

Anyway, in late 2018, I had the pleasure of eating at Vasquez with my mom. We had a lovely chat with Henry, because, as usual, he came and sat for a spell. Our conversation varied but his heart health was discussed. He knew he was on borrowed time but also realized that he had had a great run. He was happy. It is such a wonderful memory. Truly touching.

Less than two weeks later, Henry passed on to the the great land.

Here is where the new story begins. His son has orchestrated a rebirth of the Vasquez restaurant. He and his wife have done a remarkable job of a significant remodel and rebuild of the Vasquez Restaurant. Rumor suggests an open date is very near.

I need those enchiladas. You really have no idea how true that statement is. I cannot imagine a greater need for a fix like my need for those enchiladas. The recipe has long been discussed around town as it apparently was a secret which many wanted to know.

The secret is hopefully a secret that got passed down to someone else because that recipe cannot pass with Henry. I’m okay with a secret, even though I badly want the recipe, as long as I can get some of those enchiladas again.

Here is the $1000 deal. Air fare is about $650, rental car about $150, and miscellaneous stuff will easily make up the rest.

I used to fly planes. There was this old saying about the $100 hamburger. What a load of underestimating that was. To fly for a burger easily topped $350. So there becomes the justification to go for $1000 enchiladas.

Seriously though. I proposed to my Step Mom that she buy me a dozen enchiladas, pack them well with some dry ice and overnight them to me. I of course would pay. Her reply was “nope, you have to come get them.”

Ok, so a trip is in the works. Life requires us to do our best to fulfill our needs the best way we can. Sacrifices and decisions are the balance. I need those enchiladas, as we all should. I’m hoping that the recipe is back in action. Authentic, exactly as before, which was life changing and the fundamental benchmark of enchiladas to a lot of people.

Finally, here’s the real benefit. I spend $1000 to go eat enchiladas. Ok, that’s an excess. However, consider that I will get to spend time with some super special friends and my super special family during the same trip. So I just amortized those $1000 enchiladas into a super deal….

As we move throughout our Asheville home we keep finding or at least I do, things, rooms and furniture, and lights which we should change. I spent most of my Saturday very cleverly figuring how to and executing an excellent lighting design.

All of this for a mudroom. The house is odd in a way, in that there are some rooms which are critical because the room(s) are very much part of the day. Mudroom implies a space with some cuddies for shoes and a place to hang coats and sports gear. Our particular “mudroom” is attached to the garage but is also attached to a guest room, and then a hallway leading to our tv room and Tina’s office.

Having nothing really better to do and all, is me. The retired guy. The design began with built in cabinets and some pictures on the wall bracketing the room and adding personality to the space.

The construction element of the space was having cabinets made and Justin did a wonderful job. I will be hiring him again. There was a entry door to a closet in that room which I closed in and relocated the door to the hallway side, out of sight.

The wall of pictures has now become “the gallery” because, if we do this right, it’s going to be beautiful. We have decided to choose the pictures from special, unique, exhilarating, and humbling moments and experiences.

There was this crappy light that just needed to be replaced. As an aside, I had to open up the hallway ceiling and from that opportunity, I was able to see all across the structural part of the mudroom ceiling and realized it would not be to terribly difficult to put in recessed lights. It would fix a lighting mess.

Our designer came up with a solid and well thought out lighting design after meeting with a local electric supply company about some logistics. The design would include several strategically placed recessed lights and a track of these micro led track heads to illuminate the framed photos. We can control angle, eliminate shadows, and adjust color temperature which will allow these moments of our lives to be a crazy cool finish to a mudroom.